I’m on a life journey collecting memories. Feeling blessed yet struggling with the unreal circumstances of being married to a dual diagnosis ( self medicating) bipolar spouse in denial.

An actual mental health diagnosis is a new detail in our 25 year marriage . This fact clarifies the root of his unhappiness and on going problems in our marriage. He was diagnosed 6 months ago and has been an epic shit show since. His illness manifests in low empathy, delusional thoughts , verbally and emotionally abusive acts directed at me and includes impulsive risky behavior. For better or worse, I’m not sure at this point. I am grieving the loss of my life partner and struggle with having the role of parent & caretaker to a grown man. I feel a whirlwind of stress , grief and unpredictability.

My spouse suffers and deserves dignity; yet, I feel forgotten in this story . Please let me know I’m not alone! If you want to share privately, footfirstheartwillfollow@gmail.com.